The Comments: Hall of Excellence Vol. 2

Wednesday, September 4, 2013 | 17

People are reading,

and, apparently, they're not liking what they're seeing. It is time to honor some of the comments that caused me the most personal delight. If you have an aversion to dumb-shits, please visit some other website, as they are rampant here.

(NOTE: Since I switched over to Disqus, the "Best of Anonymous" is no longer an appropriate name as people can now punch in their handles willy nilly. I think it's an improvement for the site, but it hurts my ability to keep a consistent column title.)

The Nominees Are:

Gio-T said:
"D00d, seriously? Everquest is old-school on the same line with UO? Are you smoking crack? You must have forgot to mention Meridian59, Asheron's Call and Shadowbane, which actually had FFA PvP with full loot (and adrenaline rush)!

Also, you should have tried Darkfall, which rocked for the physics engine, where you actually had to *aim* your fireballs and arrows and had a real line of sight!" in MMORPG Personality - The Veteran
This is a great example of a new reader digging up an old article and pretending to have information that I don't already have. The best part about all of this is it's ~60% incorrect information. I don't mind ignorant comments, but don't pretend to be old-school.

BillyIII  said:
"Why do you hate penises so much? :)" on Mortal Online - Where the Horses Don't Jump
I don't hate penises at all! Some of my best friends have penises!

avrg eve player said:
"Yeap, eve is not for lazy people! If you have ever took some time to understand it, you would know, that there is no Win button. You can get a 10 years old charter for in game money, if the "account creation date" is the WIN button for you :) That however won't make you better at eve online.

EVE for smart "spectators", that know the difference between shooter / simulator and MMO. :)" on EVE Online - Raising the Bar for Terribleness
You're right. EVE is for the most brilliant scholars and scientists on the planet! Eve is for the calculator toting, forum crawling, adult diaper wearing, basement dwelling, cheetos consuming genius on the go. This guy just set my opinion on eve players back light-years (read as misuse of light-years as a unit of time and not distance for best effect).

Anonymous said:
"You forgot Lineage 2 in the MASSIVE list.

Dickhead." on What is a MMORPG?
I don't ever forget anything. I just abstain from mentioning Korean grind-fests in a positive light. Good day!

mlauzon said:
"I really wish people would get it through their heads, there is NO SUCH THING as a 'WOW-clone', because all MMORPGs are clones of the "Meridian 59" the first MMORPG; so every MMORPG is a Meridian 59-clone!" on Beta Impressions - Guild Wars 2
This argument was immediately destroyed by a later comment by Thrazian, "@mlauzon - That's the dumbest fucking argument I've ever heard." Yes, I agree.

Anonymous said:
"You've gotta be a bank sitter if you think Darkfall is empty. Unfortunately you probably have no idea where to look for pvp. Hence that learning curve you said you loved... fucking troll" on Darkfall Sucks - Play it Anyway
Shouldn't there be people at banks? Where do people in darkfall put their stuff!? WHAT IS HAPPENING!?

Gillsing said:
Ponytails are pretty great at keeping strands of hair from falling onto the floor where they start to mix with the dust bunnies. Which gets really annoying when it's time to collect all the dust and deposit it in a trash bag.

Though if I cut my hair I guess I'd have time to shower more often, and more of the dead skin cells would wash away into the pipes instead of falling to the floor to become dust. But then I'd have to pay for haircuts. Or find some awkward way of cutting my own hair. Or shave my head. Meh." on MMORPG Personality - The Role Player
Dude... What the fuck? Dude...

So, yeah! Join in on the conversation if you dare! I try and respond to everything of substance, and if you're especially ridiculous you may end up immortalized on this site for all of my 7 readers to see!


  1. this articl is terible so is ur face.

    (Hopefully, that'll get me in the next Hall of Excellence)

  2. I'm a ponytail enthusiast! That's the fuck.

  3. No, that is no longer an option. I now attach my earbud wires to my ponytail, so it must remain.

  4. You have 8 readers now... Sporadically

  5. You can't intimidate me!

    However, I forced myself to re-read your article and after the self-inflicted, mind-numbing tediousness, I saw your reference to having as many as 7 readers. So I lower my dukes and concede the point to you.

    However, I don't like to be proved wrong by the likes of someone like you, so I quit reading as of now, once again reducing your readership to 7. TOUCHÉ I WIN THE FIGHT!!1!111!!!!

  6. Hah. I'm one of your 7, at least.

  7. Haha, something happened in my life so I haven't had much time to play or rage on much of anything, but I appreciate the sentiment. I started a comic if you're interested.

    I assure you it is quite stupid.

  8. wtf? Some are really funny. full points for the Bee who gets bullied! :D Seems like you have too much free time...

  9. My wife has selfishly birthed a baby, so my time to play games has declined. That's why I'm drawing stupid shit.

  10. I cant use them as Wallpaper, they are too big. :'(

  11. This site is fucking amazing. Now write more content you stupid ape, I demand entertainment.


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